


Trust

by Nebula5030



Series: Merwaine Oneshots [10]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff, Gwaine Knows, I may have written Gwaine as too perfect but I DON'T CARE, M/M, Scar reveal, Slight Hurt/Comfort, Sweetness, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-25
Updated: 2018-10-25
Packaged: 2019-08-07 06:00:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,407
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16402640
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nebula5030/pseuds/Nebula5030
Summary: Merlin let out a breath, meeting Gwaine’s eyes nervously for a moment, before reaching behind his head and slipping off his tunic.Gwaine’s eyes widened.“Oh, Merlin,”he breathed.





	Trust

**Author's Note:**

> Would you believe I started this over a year ago and only finished it _just now??_  
>  Well, not quite. I have a failed long fic that I started a year ago that I'm snatching scenes from to turn into oneshots lol, so, truth be told, I don't know exactly when I started this particular bit. This is just the next one to go up.
> 
> Anyways, I hope you enjoy!

_“_ _Gwaine, I… I have something_ _I need_ _to show you.”_

That was what Merlin had said to him, earlier that day. They’d been talking, like they often did, but Gwaine had noticed that Merlin had seemed… off from his usual self. Quiet, fidgety- though Merlin was obviously trying to hide it. They’d been friends for years and courting for a few months beyond that, so Gwaine liked to think he knew the other man quite well and could tell when something was bothering him. And so, Gwaine had quietly asked him what was wrong.

He hadn’t expected that to be Merlin’s response, and had even less expected Merlin to request that they head to Gwaine’s room in order for Merlin to show him… whatever it was he felt he needed to show Gwaine. Gwaine knew he’d been entrusted with certain secrets- certain _big_ secrets (secrets that involved eyes turning the color of starlight, and others involving fathers and dragons)- so Gwaine had thought it nearly impossible for Merlin to feel nervous telling him anything else.

But Gwaine hadn’t refused, and so they’d found themselves in Gwaine’s room, Gwaine sitting on his bed and calmly waiting while Merlin stood in front of him- the servant fidgeting and clearly uncomfortable.

A couple minutes passed like this, neither of them speaking, before Gwaine let out a breath.

Gwaine stood up and put his hands on Merlin’s arms. He said soothingly as he rubbed his hands along Merlin’s biceps, “I’m not going to force you to do anything you don’t want to, love. If you don’t want to do this, or you don’t think you’re ready to show me… _whatever_ it is, you don’t have to.”

Merlin let out a breath, and shook his head slightly.  “No, no. I think it’s time you finally saw this, Gwaine.”

Gwaine paused and looked over Merlin in concern, but then he nodded. “Alright.” He took a couple steps backwards and sat on his bed once more. He gestured with his hands and asked, “So, what do you want to show me?”

Merlin bit his lip, but then reached behind his head and started to untie his neckerchief. It was followed by his jacket, and then the belt Merlin kept over his shirt, all of which were placed on Gwaine’s table.

Gwaine said nothing, easily able to tell that Merlin was nervous and not wanting to make things more uncomfortable for his love.

Merlin let out a breath, meeting Gwaine’s eyes nervously for a moment, before reaching behind his head and slipping off his tunic.

Gwaine’s eyes widened. “ _Oh, Merlin,_ ” he breathed.

Gwaine was used to seeing scars. His own body was littered with them from battles and training and petty bar fights. But Merlin… Merlin’s body was covered in some of the worse scars Gwaine had ever seen. Spanning the width Merlin’s chest was a burn scar, still red despite being several years old, with more scars layered on top of it. Around Merlin’s wrists were red rings, signs that Merlin had once been chained. Gwaine felt his heart beat heavily as he noticed other scars: old knife wounds, the tell-tale mark of a mace on Merlin’s shoulder, along with numerous other scars that mirrored those on Gwaine’s own body, and others that were far worse than anything Gwaine had.

Gwaine stood up, “Merlin, I-I had no idea-”

Merlin shook his head, face in a frown, “It’s alright, Gwaine. But, now you know.”

Merlin turned around to place his tunic on the table, and Gwaine’s breath caught again. On the back of Merlin’s neck was an old, ragged scar, several inches across. Several old blade wounds of varying depth and length were scattered along Merlin’s back, just like Merlin’s front.

The most prominent scar, however, was one that Gwaine had only heard about, and he recognized it with horror.

“ _When did you get stung by a serket?_ ” he breathed. The entire lower portion of Merlin’s back was covered in thin, black, spidery veins, and extended from a single large circular scar just above Merlin’s right hip.

Merlin looked over his shoulder at the scar and frowned. “It was a few years ago, before anyone, well, except me, knew that Morgana hated Uther. I had followed Morgana out to see what she was up to, and when she found me following, she… tied me up and left me in a serket infested forest to die.”

Gwaine looked up. “H-how did you-?”

Merlin shrugged as he folded his arms and turned with his front to Gwaine, “I called for Kilgharrah. He managed to come and save me before the damage was irreversible.”

Gwaine walked up to Merlin, whose face was a frown. Merlin let out a breath before continuing, his voice barely above a whisper, “I… I hate what my body looks like, Gwaine. There’s been so much damage to it that sometimes I wonder if it’s even mine anymore.”

Gwaine sighed as he started rubbing Merlin’s arms. “I know the feeling, love.”

Merlin glanced up, “You do?”

Gwaine nodded, “I used to feel the same way,” he shrugged and let out a breath, “But, after a while, I guess I decided I was tired of hating what I saw every time I looked in the mirror. I just… decided the scars weren’t bad.”

Merlin looked up at Gwaine, but he was still frowning, “You make it sound so easy.”

“It took some time, I will admit.” Gwaine shrugged. “At least your scars are from honorable things. Most of mine are from when the tavern owner decided I needed to pay and I was drunk enough to fight back.”

Merlin laughed slightly, but the frown returned a moment later.

“Merlin,” Gwaine started, “When I see your scars, I don’t see failures. I see times that you were challenged, times that you were wounded, but after all of them you rose back up. The fact that you’re standing here in front of me, right now, means that you overcame whatever it was that did this to you,” Gwaine smirked slightly, “Your scars tell a story, Merlin. They tell the story of _you_ and all that you have done to protect those you care about. They tell me the story of the trials you’ve faced and of the trials you’ve conquered. Yes, they left ugly marks that you’d rather not have, but that doesn’t mean that you’re worth any less because they’re there. If anything, you should bear those marks with pride, because for each one, there’s a story of you protecting someone. And that, Merlin, is the most honorable thing I can think of.”

Merlin let out a short breath, “I’d rather not have them though. That’s the problem.”

Gwaine titled his head in acknowledgment, “Well, I’m afraid I can’t get rid of your scars. Anymore than I can get rid of mine. But you’re not worth any less because they’re there,” he leaned in and said, “Merlin, you are the bravest, smartest, kindest man I know. You do everything you can to protect those you care about, going so far as to even put your life on the line. That is what your scars tell me. They tell me that you _care_. And that _when_ you care for someone, you are willing to do whatever it takes to keep them safe.”

He leaned his head in towards Merlin and continued, teasingly, “If it helps, you’re still the most attractive man I know.”

Merlin chuckled slightly. He looked at Gwaine with a smirk, “It does help, actually.”

Merlin searched Gwaine’s eyes. He had feared that after Gwaine saw his scars, Gwaine’s opinion of him might change. But, as he looked into Gwaine’s eyes, he saw the same love, adoration, and affection that Gwaine always had when he looked at Merlin. If anything, there was more of it now. And Merlin wondered how he could ever thought that Gwaine would look at him differently after seeing his scars.

Merlin smiled as he looked at Gwaine. Wondering what he could have done to have someone look at him like that. With so much care and fondness that it still caused Merlin’s heart to stutter in his chest. “What did I ever do to deserve you?” Merlin asked softly, his eyes brimming.

Gwaine smiled gently and placed a hand to Merlin’s cheek. He responded, voice hushed and overflowing with adoration, “I ask myself that every time I look at _you.”_

 


End file.
